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Posts tagged ‘saying no’

33. Getting hit on

First of all, I would like to apologize to the guy from Starbucks, I will tell the internet about his awkward moment. He is the main character of today’s story:

After spending 6 hours in the university library, I decided to take a break and head out into the real world to get a cup of coffee at another Starbucks (we have one on our campus). It was finals week, and I was bored to death by the American government studies, I just needed to see things other than the black Times New Roman letters in my American Government textbook and my unreadable notes.

I arrived with a big bag filled with notes, a laptop, charger, pens, highlighters.. you know, the student essentials. After putting my things on a chair next to a man (who was talking on the phone), I noticed a very attractive woman standing by the teas and other stuff that Starbucks sells. She must have been in her mid-twenties, tall with long dark hair, and wearing a black dress. I asked her if was waiting in line. She said no, and I proceeded onto ordering coffee from the tall barista guy.

Since ordering plain coffee takes around 10 seconds, I stepped back and waited for it before heading back to my chair. Then I saw the cell phone man approaching the woman. Was he doing it? Yes he was! He was going to go up to her and talk to her. Big move. [Whenever I tell this story, I like to imagine that everybody put their coffee down, the music stopped playing, and all eyes focused on the man about to do what no other man in the shop was willing to do: talk to “her”.] I must have been around 3 feet away from all of the action.

“Hey” said the man.

“Hi.” the woman politely replied, with a smile.

“Ordering some coffee, huh?”

“No, I’m just waiting” said the woman

“Oh,” said the man, “Do you come here often?”

Do you come here often? DO YOU COME HERE OFTEN?!? He asked her one of those questions that just give it away! It’s like saying “How YOU doin’ . . .” At this point, I gave up all hope on the man. He pretty much flipped a coin and was either about to face rejection or success.

“Sorry. I’m actually waiting for my boyfriend.” the woman said, with an “I feel sorry for you” look on her face.

“Oh, cool. Your boyfriend.” –awkward.

“Yeah,” she said, pointing at the guy taking orders at Starbucks “that’s him.”

At this moment, I looked at the barista guy, and he just smiled at the man and started to shake his head a little. I felt embarrassed for the man. He just walked back to his chair without saying another word. I didn’t know how to pretend that I hadn’t just witnessed something like that. I was hoping for the moment to end when, suddenly..

“Edwin!”

I heard my name from the other side of the shop.

“Edwin! A tall coffee?”

Oh, right. My coffee. Those 10 seconds seemed way too long.

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31. Getting rejected

They say that rejecting someone is more awkward than getting rejected, I’d like to disagree.

Whether its getting a rejection letter from your first-choice university, getting a phone call from the place you interviewed with, or when that girl you asked out gives you a very detailed excuse to not go out for coffee with you. . . getting rejected is awkward.

In fact, getting rejected is awkward before you actually get rejected! Let’s say you’re inviting a woman out for coffee. Ready.. set.. action!

Woman: You seem very nice.
Man: Thank you, would you like to go out for coffee sometime?

*Woman does not want to go and is deciding on how to say no. Awkward* 

Woman: Uh, actually I think you should know I’m seeing someone.

*Man begins to feel awkward because she’s lying or not interested. Man becomes self conscious. Awkward.*

Man: Oh. Uh, well, uh, that’s O.K. I’ll see you around.
Woman: Yeah, yeah. Of course, I’ll see you later.

Pshh.. like that ever happens! Things get extremely awkward when you get rejected like that. But what about when you get a rejection letter or a phone call? Not knowing what to say causes another one of these moments. You might think that people are used to getting rejected, like those people taking surveys on the street that everyone says “no” to, but its tough taking a “no” from people whether it is expected or unexpected.

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29. When someone tells you that they miss you (and you don’t miss them back)

Sure, you’ve been away from a certain person for a while, but you can’t exactly say that you miss them, yet they decide to tell you that they miss you.

Once they tell you that they’ve been missing you, one feels a certain pressure to say the same thing, just like when someone compliments something that you’re wearing; you feel the pressure to compliment something about them. It can be pretty awkward to just stay there quietly, or to just smile. Oh! Or how about when someone decides to ask you if you’ve missed him or her? Would you lie? Some people would.

I resort to changing the subject. I just say something like “I haven’t seen you in a while, what have you been up to?” And then the whole “missing” subject disappears. So far it’s the best option for me, since I’ve always had a tough time telling lies, it just doesn’t come out of me for some reason.

You might also like: What to do when someone tells you that they miss you and you.. well, you just don´t.

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(Disclosure:  Please note that some of the links below are affiliate links, and at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you decide to make a purchase.)

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