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I Have to Pee Really Badly

(and other search terms that lead people to this blog.)

I have to pee so bad, I have to pee really bad, I need to pee now, I’m about to pee my pants.

Yes, they’ve all been searches that lead people to here. Here’s how I imagine it this to happen.. and it involves a cell phone, drunk people, and a line for the restroom:

Wait, I think I pretty much just described the whole thing.

Because when we really have to pee, we obviously Google it. Can someone explain that one to me? Why would you GOOGLE IT? Does it help out? I mean seriously.. how? Then Google is all like,

“Yo! There’s this one website, awkwardlist.com, that has some posts on the subject, check it out dude!” so then they end up here, wondering why the heck they would Google it. Well if you happen to stumble onto here, fellow peers (haha get it? PEE-ers?.. uh never mind.) I have some tips for you:

  • Stay away from water sources that make splashy sounds
  • Look for alternative ways of relief in case of emergency
  • Remember, the closer you get to the toilet, the more you will have to pee. This makes absolutely no sense logically which means that this has to be some sort of mental thing. Use it in your favor.

So now, onto my update on search terms:

searches

Are you wondering why people STILL search for naked old people? So am I. The people at Google or Bing probably have a blast with these things. We are one funny group of social animals.

What kind of searches do you get? Please share!

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15 Comments
  1. Angie West #

    Ahhhhhahahahahahahaha!!!!

    December 3, 2012
    • LOL thanks for that 🙂

      December 3, 2012
      • Angie West #

        Oh that post just made my day 🙂 Still laughing

        December 4, 2012
  2. P.S. I think someone seriously had to pee… really, seriously, very bad. Hilarious 🙂

    December 3, 2012
    • Poor guy/gal.. HAHAHA!

      December 3, 2012
  3. I’m glad I’m not the only one who gets off the wall google search terms. “Buzz cut women” and “sexy dog women” are some of my regular search terms. Imagine how disappointed the perverts are when they open my blog… 😐

    December 3, 2012
    • Hahaha! What post do people arrive to when they search for sexy dog women?!

      Hilarious!

      December 3, 2012
  4. Maybe they are desperately trying to distract themselves from how much they need to pee? It seems to work otherwise you’d also get a lot of ‘oh no I wet myself in the queue for the toilet’ 😀

    December 4, 2012
  5. There was a search term in my blog stats a couple of days ago: ‘Old people fetish’
    I can’t check out my stats anymore, for fear of old people fetish. Awkward.

    December 4, 2012
    • That is just awkward. Like awkward in a really really weird way..

      “Old people fetish”.. that’s wrong! lol

      Edwin

      December 4, 2012
  6. “Carrie Underwood’s cellulite” and “stories of women pooping in their clothes” are two of my all-time favorite search terms that have brought someone to my blog. I guess those people needed some validation for personal problems… awkward.

    December 4, 2012
    • Stories of women pooping in their clothes HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

      Wait, do you have stories of women pooping in their clothes? That is way too random! 😀

      December 4, 2012
  7. L #

    You really wanna know why people type it on google and get to places like this?
    Well, try googling or searching wikipedia for “omorashi”, and it will all come clear to you.

    December 7, 2012
  8. Not to brag, but the search terms that lead to my site are “how to cure terminal diseases” and “what is the cure for world peace?” And they get the answers too 😉 I lied, you guys have way more hilarious search terms haha.

    December 14, 2012

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