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When fat people call themselves fat

We all know about it, we see news reports all over the place about how fat America is getting. Hmm.. I know there are readers out there from other countries, so here is a question for you: Do you see news reports on fat America in your area?

Here in the U.S. we see them all the time! They’re always like “We are fat! Obesity is a problem. It can lead to diabetes, high cholesterol, sudden death, heart attack, depression..” the list goes on and on (and on and on). These things appear on the news so often, you’d think people aren’t actually noticing this stuff on their own. We see big people out on the street all the time, but for some reason, the news people think its an awesome idea to show clips of fat people walking around on the street.

I drew up that thing in like 10 seconds, sorry for the quality, but the whole missing-people’s-heads part is totally accurate. They news people go around filming the bellies and big butts of people walking by, and they probably feel super proud of themselves when they score a fat person holding a bag of McDonald’s or a fat dude walking around with an overweight child. Can you imagine seeing yourself on one of those reports?

“Look, I’m on TV!”

Not.

It is a horrible thing. According to kidshealth.org, one in three children are overweight or obese.But when I go pick up my little cousin from school, I see maybe one overweight kid out of a class of 20. I’m not sure if they took a survey outside of a food court or something, but it seems a bit exaggerated. I guess it makes sense though, don’t television network news channels get a kick out of scaring the crap out of everyone?

DEATH! VIRUS! WAR! MOTHER-IN-LAWS!

It’s like, dude c’mon!

Well since I’m not here to lecture on obesity, and we probably get enough of it elsewhere anyway, lets talk about the awkward moment when a fat people call themselves fat.

What are you supposed to do when a person calls himself/herself fat and they actually are?

I’ve tried to come up with something to say given the many opportunities I’ve had in this exact situation over the years, but I still cannot come up with a solid way out.. Hmm..

Let us look at our options:

  • “No you’re not!”- You just lied. That’s awkward, and now they’re probably going to defend their statement and you’ll be forced to say “Ok, yeah you are.. sorry.”
  • Haha! No, I am!” – This might make you look like a jerk if you’re slim. Have you ever heard a person say something like that? They call themselves fat around a person that is actually overweight? Ugh.
  • Yeah, you are.. haha!” -Whoa, you did NOT just do that! Even though it was probably supposed to come off as a joke, its an awkward one because its true. Now you both have to pretend like it was actually funny and play it cool.
  • “…  …” – You stay silent. According to the Code of Awkwardness, this qualifies as an Awkward Silence. If the topic doesn’t get changed immediately, it gets worse exponentially. So pretend to tie your shoe, act like your phone just vibrated, or say “I have hairy elbows” for instant relief.

OK, let’s hear it. What would you say?

——

More awkward:

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13 Comments
  1. “I’ve seen plenty of people that are fatter.”

    March 12, 2012
  2. “Noooo, you’re just cuddly!”

    March 12, 2012
  3. Here in the UK we do get a certain amount of ‘oh look how fat they are getting in the US and we are following! So put down the cake and go for a run or this is what will happen to you too!’

    Depending on my mood and the situation, I’d maybe say ‘it’s hard to lose weight isn’t it’ and start a conversation.

    March 13, 2012
  4. Hahahaha!!! That’s so true! ANY time they show obese people on the news, their heads are always chopped out of the scene!

    Also, there is no good response to that statement. If someone who is large comments on their size, you change the subject. Like, immediately. And pretend as though you never heard what they said in the first place.

    And then change the subject again.

    March 13, 2012
  5. Depending on the person and how well I know them I sometimes ask if they have always been heavy–I can’t bring myself to ask if they have always been fat. This sometimes starts an interesting conversation. Other times I have asked if there is anything they can do about their weight–of course there is but this is another conversation starter. Either way I have learned people are fat for a lot of reasons and not just because they eat too much.

    March 13, 2012
  6. I usually add in some nicer adjective.
    eg. “You’re buxom.”
    “The word… is voluptuous.”
    “I was thinking more like ‘full bodied’. They use it for nice wines, why not people?”
    I mean, I don’t like hearing people down themselves like that, and I don’t believe in empty flattery either. I just like to make people smile. ^^

    March 13, 2012
  7. It is an interesting subject.
    I know people in all shapes and sizes, some of them can’t lose weight because of a medical condition and others because they love food. A wide range of people. Although most of them don’t make any comment about weight, those who comments on their own weight is mostly the slim or medium sized people (which is weird and disgusting).

    But, would someone I know extremely well I would say something like that “You are gorgeous!” And I do think that some people look better with a little extra weight.
    On the other hand if someone I don’t know that well say something like that I would probably get a little bit nervous and end up say something like “I have big feet”

    March 14, 2012
  8. Heh, since I’m the ‘fat’ one, I’ve not come across this yet. Curiously enough however, I never know what to say when someone bigger than me says the same. I do just go for the ‘awkward pause’ and ride it out… or do something stupid like fall on my face.

    That usually solves the problem.

    March 14, 2012
  9. Depends on my relationship with that person, but most of the time, I would ask them back, “Who says so? And if it is so, is that a problem for you?” This is probably tricky (or I hope it is), because if the person said “Yes,” then I would recommend some alternatives to help them lose some weight, but if they said “No,” then I would ask again, “Well, then what’s the problem?” I don’t know, it might not sound right as you read this later on, but most of the times, the people who say that in front of me here are usually the typical Indonesian people (short and skinny, definitely petite), and these are usually people who I think is far from fat or even obese, and yet they keep looking at the mirror and talking to themselves: “Gosh, I’m so fat.” It’s like watching… erm… maybe Tyra Banks saying, “My God, I’m fat!”

    March 15, 2012
  10. Cyclus #

    0.04 am
    1-2-2013
    Netherlands, the

    if this is the last you hear from me, i will be eaten by a fat person. With extra cheese. May The Maker be with us when i share this information.

    when one girl on chat said she’s fat, i froze and could move. even google couldn’t help me. It was horrible.

    after hours of brain-research and praying to Albert Einstein, i came to the conclusion;
    if you ever land in a situation like this.. The only good thing to say is: I was fat too. I know how you feel

    Please share this information brothers and sisters and dont do drugs.

    January 31, 2013
    • Hahaha. Thanks Cyclus! I’ll keep those in mind. Do you keep a blog? You’re hilarious!

      January 31, 2013
      • Cyclus #

        19-02-2013

        1:20 am

        Netherlands, The

        Right now i am inside the belly of the beast, and my leg is stuck under a piece of apple pie. My mobile phone has no connection and the battery is almost dead. I don’t know what to do. I have been recycling my own shit for days. It tastes like chicken.

        If this is the last you hear from my, please report me missing at the nearest Mcdonalds

        February 18, 2013

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